So we finally did it. We are officially married, and it sure is something else when your 19 year old son gives a toast at your wedding, and says;
“I tell people my parents are getting married, and they say aren’t you almost 20? And I tell them we do things differently in my family.” Yep we sure do.
We are a crazy bunch, not quite 19 Kids and Counting but we are close. 11 kids, three dogs, a cat and two Grandpa’s named Moon. Most people would say I am crazy for marrying someone with so much “baggage” in the first place, who knows I probably am.
But what they fail to remember, as sometimes I even forget, I was here before the baggage.. Before the kids, before the baby mama drama, before my ex, before all of the diapers, and homework, before all of the craziness, it was him & me.
Two crazy horny kids in love, and by some grace of God we are still in love after all those years. And I am glad we do things differently. I think that is what makes everything we have accomplished so special, it’s all bass-ackwards.
Now I will never recommend this to anyone else, it takes a rare breed to put up with all of the stress and drama associated with the baggage we both claim, tried to check this baggage and forget it but it’s like the baggage that just won’t be lost. Like you purposely leave it and the bell-hop brings it to you every morning. Anyway, more about that later.
We are newlyweds with 7 kids living in our house full time, 2 away at college, one that comes over when his mother lets him, and a daughter we never see due to parental alienation, she lives with her mother, less than 20 minutes away, but we aren’t fit to see her apparently, she has used her child against my husband for the past 5 years, it is very sad.
Parental Alienation is real, “Parental alienation is a significant legal issue. Unfortunately, it remains a prevalent feature of many family law cases. It intent and effect is to destroy the present and future relationship between a child and the alienated parent.” (duhaime.org)
Anyway that is one of the topics that I will be addressing. Baby mama drama, and parental alienation go hand in hand.
Their are so many children suffering because they are not “allowed” to see their fathers, for no other reason then the mother is mad. It is so disgusting as a women, and mother to see this happening to our men, and our children. We are not the owners of our children, we seek to protect them but when it is our hearts that need protection, not our child we need to learn how to separate ourselves. We need to stop being so quiet about these issues, and letting them slide under the rug. Their are Daddy’s out there that love and miss their kids, and Olivia – your dad is one of them. He loves you and thinks about you everyday.
So we have a lot going on. On top of the drama, we have the regular everyday child rearing that is involved with having a large family, and that includes so many things….
Food. Food is a huge topic in general but when you are trying to feed a family of this size, and feed them right, it is on a whole other level. Food is life, They say in some cultures, others say Bread is life, and others say Water is life, it would be so much easier if life could actually be sustained on water alone. But I am not that lucky, and although I love to cook and am constantly attempting to come up with interesting ways to feed my family on a strict budget, some times I do wish they would be satisfied with a piece of bread and some water. Or a cracker, or I could just be that mom that pops a hot dog into the microwave and says, “dinners ready!!” Just for a little while, maybe I could… ok no. I don’t even have a microwave and these kids only get organic chicken hotdogs, and they get them so rarely that they are excited. It pisses me off so bad when my kid is excited over a fucking hotdog. Really!? I just bought fresh kale and berries at the farmers market and you are smiling over a hotdog?? Kids, so food and then their is the laundry.
Laundry. Do I really need to go into detail, 9 people in the house full time, laundry. That pretty much sums it up.
Another really interesting topic is How Do We Do It? “OMG how do you do it!!,” I hear this all the time… How? I have one kid how can you manage 8!? I could never do it! People act like we are a freak sideshow and maybe we are and this blog is going to answer everyone’s question about how we do it. We just do it. On a quiet night we have 3 or 4 kids home and everyone is weirded out by it.Our relationship with our family is so important, as you will see.
Relationship. How do mommy and daddy get any time alone?! I think that this is sooo important to discuss Because our relationship has to come first, and if we do not take care of us, what good are we to our family, so finding interesting and cheap ways to stay connected to your lover is a huge topic that I am going to be talking about.
And sex. I love sex! Who can have this many kids and not be a freak, sorry kids but Daddy is sexy and Mommy needs to get her groove on to deal with all your shit. As a matter of fact I need a glass of wine to go with that side of Dad.
Education. Education is a huge topic when you have so many little minds that are looking up to you, and trusting you to provide them with the best start at life. I can and will go on and on about my experiences with the public school system, I have years of experience dealing with them and I am still sickened by a lot of the things that happen, and how the administration handles it all.
And FUN! Within all of the chores, and chaos and drama we have to remember to have FAMILY FUN! and we do. We are always planning something fun to do with the kids, and we are creative in the things that we do. You have to be when you have so many kids, and your budget it slim.
What other topics can you think of that you would like me to blog about?